Snail Spirals

An open letter to the IDIOT in the giant truck:

Dear IDIOT,

In the future, when you are driving your giant redneck truck with the side mirror extensions through the neighborhood streets of La Grande, please watch where you are going. You, IDIOT, and you alone, are responsible for your own actions. I cannot control how and where you are driving your giant truck, especially when I am on my bicycle.

Now, I’m all for bikers riding responsibly. I wear a helmet. I ride on the right side of the road. I come to a complete stop at stop signs and red and yellow stop lights. I watch out for vehicles (because many are driven by IDIOTS like you). I do understand that it may be hard for you to see me, when you’re up there in your giant truck with the side mirror extensions. I watch out and try to take care of myself while on my bike, because that’s my responsibility as a biker.

However, IDIOT, you also have a responsibility as a driver to be aware of what’s happening on the roads you’re traveling, and that includes watching out for other giant trucks (even those poor saps who don’t have side mirror extensions), cars, motorcycles, scooters, pedestrians, bicyclists, and anyone else that may be on the road. One would think that the point of having side mirror extensions would be to increase awareness of one’s surroundings, but maybe I’m mistaken. Maybe they are only there to make IDIOTS look cool.

When you drove down narrow little Spring Street at 7:55 this morning, were you even aware that someone else was on the street as well, or were you too busy talking on your cell phone? In fact, IDIOT, there was someone else on the road. Me. I was on my bike, over on the right side of the road, a fact which you should have noticed as your giant truck rumbly-growled its way up behind me, side mirror extensions and all. I was aware that you were coming, because of the rumbly-growling, and was at the edge of the road, where bikers are supposed to ride.

Do you realize that side mirror extensions extend beyond the normal space taken up by a giant truck? You should, IDIOT, because you have them on your giant truck. This is not rocket science.

Here’s another question for you, IDIOT: When you passed me, the apparently invisible woman on an invisible bike, did you not feel your passenger-side side mirror extension impact on my shoulder, sending me sprawling off my bike on the side of the road? Did you not see me sprawled on the side of the road, in either your rear-view mirror or extended side mirrors? Or were you too busy talking on your cell phone?

Because I saw you talking on your cell phone as you drove away without even stopping. Convenient that your license plate was completely mudded over, so I couldn’t call the cops.

Thanks to you, IDIOT, I have a bruised left shoulder, scraped and bruised right elbow, and a massively bruised right hip. My bike is fine, but you’re lucky I didn’t break anything.

I’m sitting at my desk now, waiting for the Advil to kick in, and wondering how I’m going to tolerate sitting on this bruise all day.

Ow.

Yours with NO LOVE AT ALL,
Sue