Dear skunk that keeps patrolling my yard and disagreeing with a raccoon three times a week...
Please stop it. No matter what the raccoons say to you, it's not worth getting that upset. You know you hold the trump card. We ALL know you hold the trump card.
Take the high road and just ignore whatever the raccoons are doing that riles you up. Please. I'm begging you.
And you, raccoons, need to back off. Nobody likes a bully. Pay attention to the lesson that the skunk is trying to teach you, and leave him the heck alone.
That is all. Thank you for your attention.